


Losing It

by idrilhadhafang



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Canon Compliant, Established Relationship, Everyone’s Of Age, First Time, Fluff and Smut, Loss of Virginity, M/M, Porn with Feelings, Pre-Star Wars: The Force Awakens
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-19
Updated: 2020-04-19
Packaged: 2021-03-02 00:53:53
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,147
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23726386
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/idrilhadhafang/pseuds/idrilhadhafang
Summary: Ben and Poe, and a loss of virginity back in days that were kinder.
Relationships: Poe Dameron/Ben Solo, Poe Dameron/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 1
Kudos: 8
Collections: Trope Bingo: Round Fourteen





	Losing It

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt: First Time/Last Time
> 
> Disclaimer: I own nothing.

It’s when Ben’s nineteen and Poe’s twenty-two that they lose their virginity.   
  
The day it happens, Ben won’t deny he’s nervous. They’re going to do it. There’s something about that that’s enough to send a certain thrill through Ben — and a certain sort of terror. He wonders, absently, if there’s something in him that will change after “losing” his virginity, because there has to be a reason it’s called “losing” your virginity, right?   
  
“You okay?” Poe says.   
  
Ben nods. “Great,” he says. “Really great. I just can’t believe we’re doing this.”  
  
Poe laughs, a bit strained. “That’s true enough.” A beat. “So who undresses first? Me? You?”  
  
Ben snorts. “Nerfherder,” he says fondly. “You’re a nerfherder. I say you should go first.” He doesn’t know how Poe will react to seeing him naked. It’s different going in swim trunks with Tai or anything like that; this is his _boyfriend,_ someone who is inexplicably attracted to him. Who chose him, of all people.   
  
“As you command, Master Jedi,” Poe jokes, and draws his shirt over his head, shrugs off his jacket. Ben watches him, awed by how beautiful Poe really is. The shape of his body — his legs, his hips, his shoulders. He’s beautiful, and Ben can’t help but feel like he’s rude for staring — even though it’s ridiculous; after all, they’re boyfriends about to have sex, why is he worried?   
  
“You okay?” Poe says.   
  
“I just feel a bit rude,” Ben says lightly.   
  
Poe snorts. “You are so damn cute,” he says. “We’re about to, you know, do it, and you’re worried about being rude? Don’t worry, Ben.” A beat. “Your turn.”  
  
Ben’s self-consciousness about his body evaporates as Poe takes him in, clearly awed, hungry. It’s something that Ben hasn’t thought about, the idea that he could be desirable to Poe.   
  
“Kriff, you’re sexy,” Poe murmurs. “You could break me if you wanted to.”  
  
“I’d never want to,” Ben says. He can’t imagine breaking Poe. He doubts he wants to.   
  
They pause. Ben wonders what to do now. He’s bigger than Poe — bigger and stronger. They just need to get around that.   
  
“I don’t want to crush you,” Ben says.   
  
Poe’s eyes light up. “You could let me be on top.”  
  
 _Oh._ Ben’s dick seems to like that idea a lot, judging by the way it hardens and curls towards his belly. “Please,” Ben says. He’s breathing heavily.   
  
“On the bed,” Poe says. He’s smiling, almost predatory in nature, and Ben lies down on the bed. He shudders, gasps even as Poe kisses, nibbles, licks, strokes down his body. He feels like his body’s on fire, an instrument that Poe is playing all but flawlessly. There’s something about it where he hasn’t expected his body to be this sensitive, this vulnerable to touch. And Poe’s asking if he’s okay, if he’s doing fine, and Ben is just pleading with him to kriff him, to be inside him...  
  
“You have any lube?” Poe says, and Ben nods. Summons the bottle that he’s usually used for masturbation to his hand with the Force, hands it to Poe.   
  
“Good thing you have Force powers,” Poe jokes, and Ben laughs.   
  
Poe slicks his cock (a long cock. He doesn’t have anything to worry about; he’s perfect) with lubricant, as well as his fingers. Those fingers...they slide in, stretching Ben, and Ben gasps.   
  
“It doesn’t hurt, does it?” Poe says.   
  
“No,” Ben says. Poe’s fingers are perfect, filling him even though it’s not enough. Somehow, he wants Poe inside him proper, even though he knows he has to be patient. Poe hitting the prostate — and Ben only knows because Holonet searches — and Ben swears that he just needs more.  
  
“Poe, please,” he murmurs. “Poe, please, Poe, please...”  
  
“Not exactly a complete sentence,” Poe teases. It’s not mean teasing, though. He kisses Ben’s nose, making Ben crinkle it in the midst of the _dear Force I need your dick_ emotions he’s having.   
  
“Poe, I need you...in me. Your cock.” Ben knows that his language is crude, but does anyone sound refined during sex?  
  
“As my Jedi desires,” Poe teases, and Ben can’t help but feel warmth in his chest and an aching in his cock all at once.   
  
Poe slicks his cock with more lubricant, and after checking in with Ben to know that it’s perfectly okay, he slides in, and kriff, it feels _good._ It’s like they’re joined, one, and judging by Poe’s moan of pleasure and the streams of obscenities and praise coming from his thoughts, Poe’s also enjoying this. Loves it. Ben’s gasping and moaning even as Poe enters him again and again, Ben’s legs clenching around Poe’s body, trapping him in. He begs Poe to touch him, to kriff him, and Poe does. Ben can’t help but be rapt by the sheer look in Poe’s eyes, the steady look of adoration and lust and concentration on making Ben feel good. Poe loves him, and Ben loves him right back, with the sort of love that Ben would use to move the galaxy for Poe.   
  
He comes embarrassingly fast. It’s a spurt, an explosion, and it’s like Ben’s body and mind have gone white-hot with pleasure. His hole — he can feel how tight and spasming he is around Poe, how Poe’s trying vainly to restrain himself.   
  
“Come inside me,” Ben murmurs. “Fill me up. I love you.”  
  
Poe releases inside him, groaning in relief. It feels hot, endless, and Poe looks so beautiful when he’s coming, as his thoughts seem to become a wash of white hot energy.   
  
Poe slips out, exhausted, clearly satisfied and content, and Ben kisses him impulsively, because he can. “Force, Poe,” he murmurs. “Thank you.”  
  
Poe laughs softly, fondly. “You don’t need to thank me. I enjoyed doing this.”  
  
***  
  
Poe stays the night at Ben’s hut. When Ben wakes in the morning, Poe’s still asleep. There’s timelines that play out in Ben’s head, possibilities where Poe can be with him forever, where Poe can be happy. Poe’s asleep, and he’s beautiful. Of course, he’s beautiful no matter what, but asleep, he’s safe. Where Ben should keep him, shielded from missions that show him things he was never meant to see. He traces Poe’s name on Poe’s exposed skin, thinking almost of his calligraphy set. He traces a sort of calligraphy on Poe’s skin with his fingertips, again and again. _I love you. I’ll always love you. You complete me. I love you._  
  
Poe stirs, turns around and kisses Ben. “You’re up early,” he says.   
  
“I have issues sleeping,” Ben says. “I feel better though, around you.”  
  
“That’s good.” Poe smiles up at him. “We have time, don’t we? Before you have to see your Uncle.”  
  
“Yeah.” Ben holds him close, and they can snuggle together, and for a moment, Ben thinks, it’s them against the outside world and nothing can touch them.


End file.
